Transitions

I'm pretty tired so this post is not going to get the attention I'd like to give it.

I've since moved out and am living with friends and family. Things have been very busy, but therapeutic. The trading thing has been on hold until I get the portfolios ready and figure out my finances clearly. Not sure if I mentioned this or not, but the bike had another issue... the Stator died on it so I had to buy a replacement. It now charges 14 volts at idle and I'm relieved. It stranded me on the highway the other day and I had to push it 1/4 mile down the road before anyone stopped. Anyways, on to my situation...

How am I handling all this emotionally? Truth is, I'm extremely grateful for all of it. I had 6 years of growing with this person, and although our relationship has changed, I have a friend for life and I've reached the point where instead of sadness about it not working out, I have gratitude for what was, what I learned and who I became because of all of it. I have sadness for sure, but most of that sadness comes because I care about her so much  and empathize for her own sadness.

It usually turns out with two people hating each other so much and being so incompatible that they just move on and eventually stop talking altogether. I think that seems to be the social norm, but I've grown to feel differently about things being that way. There's no reason for me to hate her just because we can't get along as husband and wife. In fact I have always had a ton of love for her, more love for her than anyone, but love isn't enough to keep two very different people together sometimes. And I'm okay with that.

As I've grown, new levels of feeling and understanding have developed in me. Understanding doesn't rid you of the pain of life, but it can help put it in perspective, which can drastically change how you feel about it.