Whew...

Ok, so I got my money back from Profitly. That's a relief.

So aside from that, some things to report.

I am strangely both happy and feeling some remorse that OJ is going up without me. I enjoy seeing the numbers in the simulated account, but of course would like that to be real.

The last few days, my wife has been pretty down and we are experiencing some disconnection at the moment. In part because she is having difficulty with her schedule and lack of progress/motivation. I have been a little more on the ball, waking up consistently in the morning and leaving the room to trade. There has been an obvious disconnect, and we have been sort of arguing a little bit. I have been trying to help and offer suggestions about her circumstances, but it has been made clear that she does not like to hear these things from me, and associates them very negatively.

It was explained as such: Because she sees how hard I am on my self, and in her eyes, I hate myself, she equates that as how I feel about her. I tried to make it very clear that I don't hate myself. I can be extremely disappointed with my performance and lack of consistency, without hating myself, and that I definitely do not hate her.

My last relationship had this same issue, in that she made it clear that when she was expressing problems, it was for me to listen only and not try to offer solutions. That is basically where we have arrived at the moment in this relationship as well. I get it, people want to learn on their own and ultimately you gotta do what you feel is right.

I am currently trying to condition myself to listen-listen-listen, without giving any input whatsoever if it is a problem, unless specifically asked. I'm sure I can do it, it will just take a conscious effort.